I don't know about you, but I always wanted to be a Mom.
I had dreams of rapt faces listening while we snuggled and read aloud stories...
of late night ice skating and game nights and lots of laughter...everyone eating what is put in front of them (ha!) and a perfectly neat, clean house (double ha!).
However, growing up with a large(r) family, I knew it wasn't all fun and games.
Motherhood came very naturally to me.
I didn't flip out with my first born
(or any of the subsequent ones)
or not "know what to do" or anything like that.
I honestly don't relate to those who are shocked and scared and out of their mind etc.,upon the entrance of a new person to the family.
I'm not saying I knew everything or did everything perfectly, I am saying it was not a huge adjustment for me.
It felt right.
I still dream of rapt faces listening while we read stories..and fun family events and laughter..
AND, a lot of times I even get that.
(My kids LOVE the Magic Treehouse Series (by Mary Pope Osborne) and they pretty much do sit engrossed in the story. They even gasp at the right parts. :) )
In between dreams and laughter, we have this thing called reality.
Being a mother (and/or father) is hard work.
Not all days are full of laughter.
In fact many of them, at this stage of the game, are filled with tears.
Tears of anger, hunger, sadness, rebellion, and weariness.
Days are filled with dishes and laundry and vacuuming and cooking and picking up toys for the umpteenth time. Days are filled with dirty diapers and accidents and noise and disciplining.
Days are filled with running from here to there.
Days are filled with messes.
Days are filled with words.
Kind and unkind.
They can't be undone.
One day, I will be able to sit and read a book uninterrupted.
One day, I won't have little hands pulling at me for the 30,000,000th time each day.
One day, I'll be able to use the bathroom with out having a single knock on the door.
One day, I won't have to repeat myself so much or yell just to make my voice heard.
One day, I won't have so many dishes or so much laundry or so much mess..
Then again, one day I won't have little hands coming to be kissed with a boo boo.
I won't have someone sneaking into my bed to snuggle in the middle of the night.
You see the tension here.
Those days that are far from the ideal are tough.
I find that I need to be intentional.
For us, yes, it is all roses.. ;)
most people can't say the same.
All kidding aside,
I don't mean to paint a bleak picture.
It is most certainly worthwhile and wonderful and a blessing--and hard work.
Like I said, it is the in-between times.
Make time to laugh and snuggle and be silly and let the schedule go.
The mess will keep (and lets be honest, it will not only keep--it will multiply!!).
Motherhood..Parenthood..is hard work.
It is heart work.
As an older mother told me recently, I am in the working/sowing years. She is in the reaping years.
Each day is a gift.
In the grand scheme of things, each day is one to mold and build up to complete a masterpiece.
A human life shaped by experiences, that begin now.
Our lives as parents are changed just as much as those we are molding.
Raising these kids..
it takes a load of patience, lots of prayer and grace.
Learn to cherish each day, no matter what it brings.
We all make mistakes and no one is perfect.
It is however, no mistake that your children are yours.